Tuesday, December 27, 2011

January 14, 2011--bad day...

right now, i'm sitting at my desk, wanting to cry.

i feel...

stupid.
embarrassed.
young.
immature.
humiliated.
shamed.
dumb.
fat.
silly.
foolish.
like a schoolgirl.
like a fake.
like an idiot.
hurt.
abandoned.
rejected.
angry.
sad.
tired.
alone.

i hardly interacted with her today...the energy was off and strange, and i felt like i couldn't go in and talk to her today. it felt bad. i fb chatted her asking about tonight, if she'd be working or not, and i'm so worried that i seemed desperate, obsessed, something...i'm feeling really embarrassed about it. then, she left early and didn't say goodbye or anything, though she'd said she would come to the dance party today...she's not. she just left.

i'm such a fool...i feel really dumb right now. what did i think was going to happen?

1 comment:

  1. It was so hard to see you so self-depricating around that time.

    ReplyDelete