Thursday, December 29, 2011

February 3, 2011--chat comma brazen

so....back story. earlier today, when i walked with her to get her lunch, i mentioned that the smell of ciggy smoke wafting past us smelled good. she looked at me dismayed, "you don't smoke!?". i explained to her that i don't, but had taken my first real drag the weekend before, and that i was admittedly kind of wanting to do it again. she implored me to stay away, wide eyed and beautiful, and said that if she "had an insane voice like mine" she'd take the best care of it, what was i thinking!? (reading this again, i realize that that sounds more swoon inducing than it was. i mentioned first that i'd always stayed away to protect my voice, but b/c i don't really sing anymore, what's a cig every once in awhile? and then she talked about my voice. not as amazing. but still nice...)

so then i posted to my fb status tonight that i'd sung at the top of my lungs the whole car ride home (leaving out the crying and the pining, of course). then my phone bleeps telling me that she has commented on my status. she made mention to my nice CLEAN lungs, and i felt my heart swell that she was noticing me, fine with me knowing she was noticing me AND worrying about my budding nicotine habit, and i of course turned on the laptop and said hi.

the highlights:
  • she said that she knew i would show up, b/c she's realized that if she comments on stg i write, i'll show up eventually, like with the bat signal. ha! i admitted my obsession with fb, but then also brazenly said "whatever, you love it."
  • she mentioned, without my asking, that she's bartending tomorrow. i brazenly asked if she'd like company. she said "yes, you guys should come." okay, fine, a group invite, but whatever, i'll fucking take it. the funny thing is that i was planning to ask her tomorrow if she was working that nite, with every intention of stopping by, by myself or not.
  • she told me that she'd discovered how beautiful the sound is of the layer of ice that's covering the snow shattering under foot. she told me she wants to go record it for one of her stories that she wants to set to music and video. i brazenly (are you sensing the theme?) said in response "omg. you are cute." she responded with a :)
  • she mentioned a time when she'd karaoke'd with strangers. i said how much i needed some karaoke in my life. she said she did too, and that she was going to have such fun after the lsats were done. i (brazenly) said "yes! take me with you! :p i feel like our ideas of what's fun line up nicely, it's nice...so many of my other friends are...boring. or far far away" she ignored my non-subtle intimation that i want to be her bff (that's bisexual fucking friend) and instead asked about my "far away" friends, but whatever, i know she "heard" me!
i think that's it. i also think i might have gone a little over board. but whatever. i like her. i don't think i care so much if she knows it, at least as far as the normal "i like you as a person and want to hang out with you" liking goes. don't people like to know those things? or am i being a "creeper" as the kids are saying now?

whatever.

i love her.

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