Tuesday, January 24, 2012

December 30, 2011--return...

Note from the future: Skipping violently ahead here. I didn't write in November and December. Not quite sure why. Maybe because I was moving, and losing a job, and working a temp job, and going out alot with my friends, and trying to get a real job, and dating this girl who I won't even deign to write about, because the whole thing was ridiculous, and spending a lot of time in my apartment with my Netflix feeling sorry for myself. Yeah, that might be what I was doing. Now back to our regularly scheduled programming...)


I had sex with SM again last night.  We seem to not be able to not end up in bed together, and I'm not sure what I think about this.  I think she's beautiful, and I really, really like fucking her. But, I don't think we can really date, for all the reasons that I've already talked about.  And things feel different between us now. Comfortable, yes, but....restrained somehow.  Or maybe it's just that I don't have any expectations for the relationship anymore, and am just going with the flow, which is something I don't think I ever really do, just let things happen and see where it goes. So maybe that's why it feel different.

But she seems to want to see me regularly again, she makes an effort recently, which feels nice.  Last night I was out with my bestest bff, who's in town visiting, and she asked what I was doing, and then actually followed up later and came and met us along with 2 of her friends whom I adore and have missed.  And all of this was just pleasantly surprising, as opposed to being expected in any way.  So we all hung out and it was fun, and we talked about how funny it is that we've known each other for almost a year, and she said she's happy that I'm in her life, and I said "ditto" and....then she came home with me and we had sex and it was hot and I really don't think there's much I like more than making a girl come. Loudly. Love it.

So, anyway....that's happening....ish. We'll see.

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