Behold, Tumblr!

Hi lovelies!
I finally made a tumblr for this blog, woot!
If you're on tumblr (and if you're not, um, why? It's the gayest place on earth.) come say hi. I'm gonna be following back and all that jazz. Only just got it going, so not much to see yet, but there will be lots to see. Lots of gay, girly things to see.

Get pumped.

<3

Follow @edie_wyatt

in which I am baffled by my past...

I've been working on the book today, editing things I wrote in 2006, when I was 24, and it is a jarring fucking experience, lemme tell you.

I was SO. YOUNG. So confused, so self-absorbed, so dependent on how others saw me to have any way to see myself. It's painful to re-experience, honestly.  I was using my sexuality to try to feel seen, loved, relevant. And, shockingly, it didn't work. Go figure.

And more than that, I was SO STRAIGHT. I mean, what?? Honestly, if it hadn't happened to me, and not that long ago, I would be confused as hell by where I've ended up, i.e. gay. I mean, at 24, I was having a lot of sex, with several men. Often.

There were a lot of naked penises in my vicinity is what I'm saying. (Don't worry, you'll get to read all about that in the book-that part of my life, though interesting and completely insane, doesn't really fit in with the theme of this blog!)

But my point is, that is quite literally a state of affairs that I have no interest in EVER happening again. Now, I am quite happily face deep in vagina and that's exactly how I like it, thank you very much. But 6 years ago I would have looked at you like you were cray if you had suggested that I would ever find myself fantasizing about, much less actually, fucking women and having no place else I'd rather be.

It's just--I mean...

Whaaaaat!!!????

So I guess what I'm saying is, that whole "sexual fluidity" thing...sure is a thing!

Oh, and also I was an asshole.

Follow @edie_wyatt

Bloglovin? Okay, then!

Hi lovelies, I recently discovered Bloglovin.com, which is apparently one of the new options to follow all the blogs you used to read in Google Reader (RIP), and anyway, I wanted to "claim" my blog as mine, so, here I am, claiming my blog! New, actual post coming later tonight!
<3
Follow my blog with Bloglovin

Ch-ch-changes

Hello dear readers!

It's been a very, very long time since I've updated, and I first want to apologize for that! It got hard to write about my relationship since, well, it's actually kind of a healthy one, filled with much more communication and love and respect than drama and guesswork and games, and apparently I'm not nearly as moved to write when I'm not feeling tortured. Go figure!

So I take it as a good sign, overall, that I haven't been around here much, though I'm sure at least 5 of you out there have been wondering what's happened to me! :)

I've been seeing from my stats and from some messages I've gotten that this blog has been and continues to be helpful to at least a handful of you, and that it's been meaningful to some of you to read someone else's story of bumbling along and figuring things out as you are in the process of doing the same.  And that's really the entire point of me putting my story online for all to see--to let you know that you're not alone, and that all the crazy shit you're trying to figure out IS crazy, but that you will also figure it out, and that tons of crazy shit happened to me too, and I came out of it...semi-ok!

Out of that sense of wanting to share my story so that others can feel not-so-alone, and maybe even be inspired to take some risks in their lives as they try to find their truth, I've started working on a memoir of sorts, based on this blog as well as 3 years of writing that I did BEFORE this blog, back before I was even married (ohhh, there are some good stories there!).  Getting my story out there in book form is going to take awhile, but while I do that work I wanted to give those of you who have found me here at New Lesbian a way to talk to me and keep up to date on when you'll be able to read more of my story.  I'll be leaving the blog up while I work on the book, but I would also like to open up this space up as a forum for people to ask me, and all of you, for advice with whatever confusing situations they may find themselves in as they're navigating their relationships and their sexuality.

So! I've created a twitter account under my never-before-known pseudonym (@edie_wyatt) and put a Follow Me button in the sidebar, so feel free to come hang out with me there. I'd love to actually talk to some of you who've been reading, I know there are a lot of you! If you're struggling with the kinds of stuff I've struggled with, and want advice, or HAVE advice to give (or just wanna talk about gay stuff), let's talk!

<3, Edie