on wednesday of this week, i asked my husband how he would react if i told him that i needed to sleep with a woman, or a few, and that that's what i need to do right now, and that's that. i asked him this because i have realized that this is true. right now, i want to have sex with women.
i've realized that, even if things don't happen with 10.0, if i'm never able to tell her how i feel about her, if she never breaks it off with her girlfriend and i just have to love her and never have her, i still need to fuck some women.
i'm getting more used to this every day. last night, hubby and i watched a little porn, and i was really only interested in the lesbian stuff. and it got me hot, and quickly. hot and jealous. i was especially turned on by the two girls 69-ing each other. i want some pussy in my face. and i want a girl's tongue on my clit. there, i said it.
my husband actually said that he would be more okay with me needing to go outside the marriage for sex with women than sex with other men, so that's something, anyway. but now what? i can't move forward with 10.0, i really want to be respectful of her relationship, so i have to wait. she's driving me crazy and i want her so badly, but i must wait. i know that.
so then, where does that leave me? i need to find a woman who wants me and doesn't mind that i've never done this before. where do i find her? them? are there lesbian/bi women out there who don't mind showing an almost 30 y/o woman the ropes? i hope so. i need them.
HA! So funny to think about you wondering if anyone would show you the ropes :) But a totally understandable concern. This must have been so cathartic for you to write about your true desires here!
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